sharktrash | Glencola Reef Inbox

Bien! :) If you can find the stuff to do it, I can tell you how to make moonshine. Just be careful. It'll knock you on your ass. Hoo! That shit's not joke, man, I'm telling you. You wanted to knock her out, Mother Teresa! I was there. Just a little bit of fatherly advice, eh? The ladies don't like it so much when you talk about how you want to knock them unconscious. Kinda kills the mood, you know?

[ His protectiveness of Chloe is automatic, almost knee-jerk, so much that he doesn't even realize that's what he's doing; Lalo knows how he would react if he was injured and somebody was talking about knocking him unconscious, and next to his hypothetical behavior, Chloe's almost assuredly does look like the actual Mother Teresa. ]

You know what? Changed my mind. No sword for you. But if I find any good liquor, it's yours. And here:

[ instructions for how to make home-brewed alcohol go here because I'm lazy; lmk if you want me to dig something up lol, also he prob gives a few different examples but at least one uses agave bc lalo! ]

Or, if you wanna live real dangerously, just do it how they do it in prison: get some water, get some fruit, some sugar - but you gotta find it, let it sit in a bag in the sun for a few days, the fruit'll ferment and turn into wine. [ It'll fuck you up AND give you botulism! Nice! ]

That's right! Wouldn't you be? Who wouldn't want to see my charming face up close?

[ And? :) ]

Edited 2023-09-21 04:14 (UTC)

Ok, what stuff

[ good LORD this wall of text-- ]

Yeah 'cause she wouldn't agree to let us carry her like a reasonable person. How special does she think her tits are that she can't let them touch a guy's back lmao

Forced my hand, doesn't count

[ He squints at the transceiver suspiciously. ]

Ok it's cute you wanna be her big strong savior or whatever but let me just clear up something quick

If I wanted to kill her she'd be dead

I don't need a weapon for that

So the only thing you're accomplishing here is pissing me off

[ He sure is acting like there's an actual sword he's being denied rather than a hypothetical situation-- ]

[ Oops, this is maybe... a bit closer to admitting he's a professional assassin than he would normally let himself get, but. Something tells him this Benlo person doesn't particularly care about the law anyway. ]

[ And he can always deny it later. ]

[ Well, at least he's getting several booze recipes so it's not all for nothing. ]

Isn't it just gonna go bad?

[ And everything! >:( ]

Yeah no if you're trying to get me to run your errands I'm gonna need more information than that. You got something they want?

[ A few things click immediately into place for Lalo with this response. He doesn't have Squalo pegged as an assassin specifically, but a subconscious suspicion crystalizes. This entire missive, and the attitudes strewn throughout it, basically say, "I am absolutely some variety of criminal, and probably in bed with organized crime" - and since Squalo is notoriously Italian, the mob feels like a safe bet.

And, let's face it. Getting angry someone hypothetically told him he couldn't have a hypothetical sword, as if he had been denied an actual sword? Tuco behavior.

So, then. Lalo has to try to walk a delicate line of respectful, but not overly submissive. Appearing weak might be disastrous, but an escalating war of threats to kick each other's asses seems equally counterproductive. ]

Easy, man, easy. I don't have a sword. [ Since Squalo apparently needs the reminder. ]

And hell yeah it goes bad! That's the fun part. We call it Botulism Roulette. ^_~ [ Where did he learn anime smileys now? We just don't know. ] But there's a sweet spot, eh? Where it can get you tipsy without making you sick. You just gotta get lucky.

[ He contemplates what to say next. ] Whoa, whoa, whoa! Amigo! You've got it all wrong. You're not doing my errands. I'm giving you this information as a tribute. As a way to say, thanks for your help. You may do with it whatever you wish. DN999R, he likes technology. But he's open to bartering other things too. He says this "friend" who knows things. Me, I'm not sure if I believe him, but hey! Now you know what he's saying too.

[ Well. He's got all of that right, not that Squalo's making it very hard. ]

For now.

[ There might be a sword later, dammit! ]

[ He stares at the smiley and shudders. ]

Think I'd rather drink disinfectant.

[ That may or may not be a joke. ]

Did he offer anything in particular? Kinda weird to just message someone and be like "Yo bring me five cellphones and a gameboy and I'm gonna give you fuck-all that I pull outta my ass", ya know?

I will let you know if I find a sword.

[ He definitely won't do that, but Tuco usually forgets about this shit after a while, even when he gets huffy about it in the moment. Here's hoping Squalo is the same... although Squalo does seem smarter than Tuco, Lalo is forced to reluctantly admit to himself, so who knows. ]

Yeah. About that. Nothing important. I was just curious about who this callsign belonged to, so I asked him. He said he knew, but wouldn't tell me how. Between you and me, eh? I'm a little more interested in how he'd know something like that than who a callsign belongs to.

Edited 2023-10-06 00:31 (UTC)

Good.

[ Squalo is pretty smart, but he's also pretty manic and temperamental. It's entirely possible he will forget, or at least not have it at the forefront of his mind until he actually sees a sword in someone's hands and gets mad that it's not in his. ]

Probably spying on us, piece of shit. Didn't that guy Martin talked to say something about another group of people being here? If they've got that kind of tech, though, I wonder what he'd want with the scraps of it we've got.

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