Little Hades IC Inbox + Mailbox

[sharktrash]

SUPERBIA SQUALO

IC INBOX ► email: suckmydick@hellmail.com ►email: varia@hellmail.com ("business") ►email: s.squalo@brimstone.com (work) ► associated hellnet usernames: swordking grandepioggia swordemperor ► phone: 666 1010 3926 ► address: Gehenna Lane 1010 ► work addresses: Brimstone Retrieval office The Pit (Chainsaw Caesar hours)

Write, call, send mail, poop, post lizards, come over to bother him in person, etc.

code by cindergraphics adapted from bannertech

Comments

text; i am so sorry

[sackler]

[sometime following this thread.]

hey someone gave me this number & said you're a therapist?

never be sorry

[sharktrash]

[ ??? ]

[ who the fuck ]

if someone told you to jump off a building would you do it

[sackler]

no but depending upon the height and depth of the water, i'd consider jumping off a bridge. but in all seriousness is this the right #?

[sharktrash]

alright that's reasonable

who gave you this number

[sackler]

i didn't catch his name but he has dark hair

[Also wears clothes, so totally helpful, right?]

[sharktrash]

[ yyyyyup super helpful ]


scars?

[sackler]

i don't remember, but he was kind of short? some kind of uniform, and compared himself to sour fruit. does that sound like anyone you know?

[sharktrash]

no i don't consort with midgets

i wouldn't call myself a therapist but i can make your problems disappear

[sackler]

i wouldn't say he's a midget, just shorter than me but no worries. maybe he just got your number from somewhere before he passed it along

what kind of disappearing are you talking about? 12-step or like sleeping with the fishes??

[sharktrash]

mostly the second one

how much are you paying

[sackler]

oh
well in that case the problems are very much alive and would definitely wind up in here to torment me so best not to expedite that right

[sharktrash]

making them disappear permanently* will cost extra

*with 90% certainty

[sackler]

how much extra?
do you have a yelp page?

[sharktrash]

depends. i can give you an estimate if you provide more details for your request.

no website but we do have a private email.

[sackler]

she's a normal person, just incredibly selfish and talks a lot. she's also kind of lazy and can't run fast? so for a professional she's probably not much of a challenge

but i'm not 100% on this, i've got a lot to consider if i go this route

[sharktrash]

sounds like someone not worth my time, actually

i'll send our errand boy after her

just say a word


[ godspeed Oboro ]

[sackler]

i've gotta think on it. [see: is this worth eternal damnation? maybe. maybe not.] how much would it cost me?

[sharktrash]

$300 should be enough for him

[ailes_dor]

[The box is huge. It pretty much hides the little delivery demon who is trying to carry it. Inside the box, there's a little note. Saw this, thought of you. Wish you would be eaten by a real one <3 Gabe]

best package ever

[sharktrash]

[ omfg you bitch ]

[ ...he's still taking it and bringing it to his room, though. DON'T JUDGE IT LOOKED CUTE. AND COMFY. And he can cuddle it in his sleep. :/ ]

[ He also sends back a note; "I have." ]

that's what he said

[ailes_dor]

Poor shark, it clearly didn't like your flavour.

Is it as cuddly as it looks?

text; un: swordemperor

[sharktrash]

Hey, I didn't ask it to eat me.

And no. It's awful and sharp all over.

[ailes_dor]

Just like you then?

Thought you might hate it, cos it's nice and stuff. It might make you feel worse or something.

[sharktrash]

...what the hell kind of person do you think I am

[ailes_dor]

stupido.

I'm teasing. I thought it might cheer you up. And it's fun. So you know, can't go wrong?